Today I have been with my grandparents and everything was good. But as I arrived home it fell on me. I wasn't thinking about you for the whole day but now the only thing I can think about is you. How I would love to have you by my side and how we would enjoy our time together.
It was an amazing day and as I was driving through the nature and little villages I thought about the fact that I might not have a chance to show them to you. All the autumn colours and beautiful scenerie. But I was in peace with that because I knew I will have a chance. I felt it in my heart. But now my belief and trust betrayed me.
Hugging you is the only thing which would calm me down. I don't know what am I doing with my life. I don't know on what to focus. I cannot decide what to do. Where to go. How to settle if so.
Panic attack. It is here...
I can feel that you have already moved on. But I will still dream about you standing in front of my parent's house. Ringing the bell and just standing there, without words. Me running to you. Hugging you and never letting you go away ever again. No explanation needed. We would know. Our souls speak to each other. We do not need words.
Our skin touching is relief. It is the trustfull feeling of safety. When we are together the world is spinning in the right direction, in the right speed.
To be together is the calm feeling of goodness. World is the way how it should be. It is happiness. Pure emotion. Pure us.
But now it is just me writing these stupid texts for nothing. For the sake of releasing a bit of my heartache. For the sake of self-reflection. To understand myself and to give more strenght and probability to my wishes.
One day you will stand in front of those doors.
I know it.
My love.
Babovkito.
Take the time you need.
I will not wait for you. But I will be there. What is ment to be will happen.
Žádné komentáře:
Okomentovat